| Cats, birthdays, and glögg |
[Dec. 19th, 2008|10:10 pm] |
Sooooo I'm naht a cat or whatever anymore. That was fuckin weird. And before ya guys even START sayin shit that Dok is all an evil scientist and blah blah, this was totally a legit accident and ya should be pointin yer fingers at fuckin Schrödinger, naht him. Yea. Ya know what I mean.
But uh.. ears like that and tails are naht fun. The claws were kinda cool. I found out that water can be used as a weapon and that its really really easy to accidentally hogtie yerself with twine. Hopefully this never happens again. I'm all fer jest stayin human fer awhile.
AND DOROCHET. WHAT THE FUCK DOOD. STAHP WITH THE CHASIN. FUCKER.
Everything jest needs to like, chill fer awhile. No more surprises. Jest gahta get through Christmas.
Oh yea, and my fuckin wife tried to sneak his birthday by me. I caught that shit. Gaht him this koi pond thing he wanted. I dunno. Whatever makes him happy. I dunno what the koi are about.
But its wintertime, and that means eggnog with booze, and glögg all around. I can't argue with that.
BUT I CAN ARGUE WITH THIS: WHY THE FUCK DID THEY DISCONTINUE ZIMA?! DOOD. WHY.
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 10th, 2008|08:53 pm] |
Japanese people are fucked up. No offense, naht all of ya. But why d'ya guys love Paris Hilton so effing much? Its like she's Jesus or somethin. Normally when I go out somewhere with Dok, there's some douchebag fan that's all 'oh my gahd its Pickles' and all that bullshit. Naht it Japan. Naht even close. Oh they noticed me. Cus I'm totally the same height as everyone else there and ya'd think red hair and freckles would stick out a lot, even if they didn't know who I was. A bunch a people saw me and were all mumbling in Japanese "Oh! Pikurusu!" Yea, my name sounded that fuckin weird. Then Dok steps out with me. And they lost their fuckin minds. I guess the only time a seven foot tall skinny ass blonde goes over there is when Miss Shitty-Night-Vision-Sex-Tape makes and appearance. It was like a fuckin mob and then were all "PARISU!" and screamin and takin pictures. Oh my gahd I'm not doin that again.
And gahd we went shoppin so much. Why? Whats the point? I gaht too much stuff already. But it made him happy. Thank gahd fer McDonalds and their picture menus cus I was so fuckin lost and I ain't eatin eel on a stick bullshit. Gimme some booze and lemme eat my cow. The cat boy showed up half way through too and stayed with us fer awhile. Wasn't so bad. He kept away from my hair, but I think I caught him tryin to count my freckles when I was halfway to passed out.
I'm supposed to be happy and shit right now! I finally gaht my shit together and I gaht a good thing goin! But no, apparently MY fuckin old band is back together. WITHOUT ME. Those motherfuckers gaht a restrainin order against me. I'm hearin there's this fuckin tv show about how they gaht a guy to replace me and some shit? Fuck that! I'm fuckin pissed off! I gahta talk to em. This is fuckin bullshit. Somebody come get me when that thing is back on, cus I ain't doin shit but drinkin between now and then. |
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